Tuesday, February 14, 2012

(Stupid) Shit That Authors Say

In honor of the Shit That (insert here) Say videos that are popular on the net, I’m doing a written version for authors…only the STUPID shit they say.

The last blog advocated my fellow colleagues…now I’m gonna expose the dumb shit I’ve heard from authors in my travels...some of the nonsense posted are things I've said in the past.

I didn’t feel like doing a video version and posting it on YouTube…I’m a writer…I’ll leave the movie star shit for others.

Aight…peep game 

1) "I’m shooting a movie version of my book next week"

Unless your joint is low budget, Hollywood ain’t fuckin’ with you when you have less than a million book buyers


2) "I sold out of books at the last signing"

See my last blog

3) "I sold over 10,000 copies"

Again, see my last blog…if you sold over 10,000 (I’ve heard authors say 100,000) then why are you leaving the game if the game is so good to you?

The average book sales for an independent/self-published author for a single title is between 100 and 1,000 copies…if you’ve sold more than that, you’re on your way to greatness

4) "I don’t work a day job"

CLICK HERE to see where I’m coming from as well as a cross reference to point 3

Don’t get it twisted…writing books is not my only profession or “hustle”

5) "I don’t write for the money"


6) "It doesn’t matter if the book I’m writing is about sex, violence, and drugs…as long as people are reading"

I HATE when authors say that load of fuckery...That’s probably the most back handed comment to the consumer I’ve heard since stepping into the book industry…LOL

7) "I write about the hood because that’s all I know"

Yes, and you also write hood shit because your imagination is limited

8) "It’s about the art…fuck the business"

Yep…and that’s why you’re broke

9) "My books are too deep for the reader…that’s why they don’t get it"

Well…maybe…maybe not…material that’s light on the mind will always sell more…you gotta target the right people and build your buzz around them


10) "My shit ain’t selling because people are stupid and they don’t like real shit"

I feel your pain…I’m gonna
drop a jewel from something a wise man once told me, “put the medicine in the ice cream and people WILL get it”

Aight, ya’ll…that’s my Top 10 in no particular order…I could’ve posted more…I fell back on that impulse…I didn’t wanna appear as a “hater”
...whatever that means.

Until next time

Peace and Afro Grease


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