The Slim Guy Who Loves Big Girls: RECAP: Ms Full Figured USA Pageant Show

Yours truly...suited and booted

Abracadabra, my people

Theresa Randolph hosted the 23rd annual Ms Full Figured USA Pageant Show in Newark, New Jersey this past Sunday

Before I start, I wanna say Newark has to be the Black lesbian capital in the country…Combined with the past book signings I’ve done in Newark along with what I saw Sunday, I’ve never seen a high number of sistas who played for the other team in one area

Only in Newark where you’ll find a lesbian chick greet someone with As-Salāmu `Alaykum ("Peace to you" in Arabic)…Newark has a long history with the Islamic culture…so I guess that’s expected

I also wanna give a big FUCK YOU to the dumb niggas who double parked alongside the cars on Park Place…it took us damn near 2 hours to leave the joint because heads were too lazy to find a parking spot to hit up the lounge and club on the strip

You literally had a row of double parking on one strip…never seen anything like it

Aight, enough with the social commentary

The show was off the chain!!!…beautiful women galore…there’s nothing like a thick sista

The show started @ 6pm, and I got there a little bit after…the damn flash on my Canon wasn’t strong enough to take flicks in a dimmed room…I alternated between the Canon and my BlackBerry (my BBM Pin: 325CC038)

That sucked because while the BlackBerry has better lighting, the Canon has a better zoom

I still snapped some good flicks besides that

Of course you know I passed out bookmarks for Thick When the Chances are Slim…I’m pissed because A) I didn’t bring enough bookmarks and B) I should’ve waited to catch people at the end of the pageantry by standing at the exit

I know what to do next year…the joint held at least 250-300 heads…a good sized ballroom @ the Robert Treat Hotel

Speaking of passing out bookmarks…

I was in a passive mood that evening for some odd reason…so I gave this slender, dread locked dude 20 dollars to pass out bookmarks…I figured I'll break bread with my brother...and guess what, I’ll NEVER do that again.

Homie said “This is light work” because he’d promoted before (that’s what he told me)…needless to say, dude didn’t finish the stack I gave him

Not only that, but dude was snail slow with passing out the bookmarks as if the hands of time were on crutches

And you know what, I’m not mad at him…it’s my fault…I should’ve snapped out of that shy shit and got on my grind like I usually do…I’ll charge that 20 bucks to the game and learn from that mishap

Oh yeah…you know I had to make money selling books…I sure as hell wasn’t paying for vending fees…LOL

That doesn’t make me cheap…I’m just smart with mines

I did some networking…met some new heads, and ran across a few heads I already knew

Mike, CEO of Bigger and Better Thangs Entertainment, interviewed me briefly during the show…much love for the quick plug for THICK

Besides a chick who couldn’t hold her liquor the event was drama free…of course you had thirsty dudes tryna holla…hey, I don’t blame them…a lot of the women in that piece were bad (bad meaning “good” for the ebonically challenged folk)

I don’t know what the hell women are eating nowadays because a lot of them were built like horses…real talk

The next big show (no pun intended) for the plus size modeling industry is Full Figured Fashion Week in June…you know I’m hittin that up to show my support for the sexy ladies...Ooooowwww!!! #TeamThick

Aight, ya’ll…I only selected a few flicks to post…enjoy them and the comments